Free the Nipple

Free nipples 1

While browsing the other day, I came across a New York Times Article focusing on the gender inequality of laws allowing men to be topless in public while arbitrarily denying women that very same right.  The article featured a short, rather graphic video that aroused certain feelings… of sympathy, I think… and I watched it with considerable interest.

Several times, actually…

http://graphics8.nytimes.com/video/players/offsite/index.html?videoId=100000004162595

Anyway, being something of a libertarian, I hate the idea of anyone or anything being held captive. Even as a child I rather disliked zoos and the immortal words of William Blake have always resonated with me:

 

“A Robin Redbreast in a Cage

Puts all Heaven in a Rage.”

 

I too feel that any sort of breast, including the nipple, should be free… free to fly, to sing and to… Well, Okay… that’s a pretty crappy analogy, but I’m sure you get my drift.

Still, though I am in favor of changes to the law that extend freedoms fairly, and though the arguments presented in favor of allowing women to be topless are pretty nearly unassailable, I also must confess to having some mixed feelings about the issue.  I don’t for a minute think that civilization would come to end if all of a sudden every single woman in the world decided to go about in full nipular-glory, nor are my reservations founded on prudery at all. It’s just that… well, I have a deep abiding fear that a brave new topless world might take something away from life rather than add to it…

For a brief period… a year or so, I had a consuming (but largely practical) concern for breasts and then, after I was weaned, I went through a much longer period of complete indifference. Since then… and roughly from about age 13 to the present… my interest in nipples and all things connected has been deep and sincere. Chiefly, I have to say, because I just don’t get to see them that often.

Let’s face it… as a man (and as with all men), the sudden flash of a nipple (especially when it is unexpected) is a thing of fascination. We *have* to look… My wife understands this… In fact, if I happen to be away from the living room while the television is on, she will call me urgently if there is even the slightest danger that I might miss a nipple sighting. For this, I am very grateful. A gratuitous and fleeting display of naked breasts, as it presently stands, is one of the great joys of life.

Everyone has heard how the Victorians used to cover piano legs to avoid embarrassment, and went to great lengths to ensure that no lady ever exposed any portion of her ankles or above… I suppose it must have been that, for a Victorian Gentleman, a sudden glimpse of stocking must have been a hugely erotic thing back then. Now though? I confess, I can walk on a beach, or around a swimming pool, and the sight of even hundreds of completely naked ankles really does nothing for me. A shame …  perhaps.

What would it be like if all of a sudden I could see untethered nipples everywhere I looked? There is a momentary sense that this would be fantastic, and then cold reality ruins it for me. Wouldn’t it be like Victorians and ankles? Wouldn’t a surfeit of nipple sightings eventually engender a mammary ennui and thus take away some of the spice of life?

Ah well… Obviously fairness has to rule over such considerations. I suppose I can hardly expect that social progress should be retarded for the benefit of my own titillation…

 

 

 

 

 

The Cat-A-Pult Experiments

The Catapult

Before becoming a housewife and mother, Hilda Thompson was best known for her pioneering research in the field of Feline Ballistics.

At age 10, she managed to fling a Tabby nearly all the way to the end of her backyard and, just a couple of years later, she achieved ‘Kittypult’ success by launching a pair of Longhair Tortoise Shells over 3 neighboring houses and into the middle of a nearby field.

Shown here, at age 14, Hilds is preparing to test certain adjustments she made to her launching device using not one, not two, but three Siamese kittens. She appeared very happy with her equipment improvements and confidently predicted that she could ‘get the little buggers all the way back to Siam… or wherever.’

Sadly, the results of the experiment appear to have been lost to history. In researching the fate of the three little cats, it has come to my attention that there may be a slim, teensy possibility that my information as to the subject of this picture is not completely correct. If so, can anyone suggest what the hell *IS* going on in this photograph??

Repeal of the Spanking Laws

Spanking 01

Section 43 of the Criminal Code of Canada makes it lawful for a parent, guardian or teacher to use force to discipline children as long as the force used is ‘reasonable under the circumstances’. However, as reported in a recent CBC new story, the Liberal Government has promised to repeal the law, effectively making any sort of spanking illegal. One has to ask … Is this really a good idea?

The plain wording of section 43 is further enhanced, or ‘rounded out’ by a host of court decisions on the issue and one of the leading principles flowing from these is that physical correction ought not to be undertaken in anger, but rather should be measured and intended for educative or corrective purposes. Surely, as many people seem to agree, if a little spanking can benefit a child, and we adhere to proper legal guidelines, why throw out something that clearly works? Continue reading →

5 Great Movie Quotes

Great Movie Quotes

 

Can you identify the movies from which the following quotes are obtained? All 5 movies were box office hits and each had some very memorable lines. However, the ones listed here are a bit more obscure than those most commonly quoted and are my favorites. How many can you get? Continue reading →

Will your Christmas be White?

Snowy Xmas Stats

Want to know the likelihood you’ll have a traditional snowy, white Christmas?

Environment Canada had put together an analysis of weather stats from 43 major Canadian centers over a 58 year period which you can view here.

The breakdown includes the general likelihood for a given location (expressed as a percentage), along with the chances of it occurring during the years 1994-2013 and 1965-1984.

Only 4 cities came in at 100% for all three periods and, somewhat unsurprisingly, three of these were the Territorial Capitals: Iqaluit, Whitehorse, and Yellowknife. Can you take a stab at guessing the fourth? Unless you live in the city in question, I can pretty much guarantee you’ll be wrong.

Trump’s Muslim Ban

Trump Ban 1

While everybody else is bumbling over silly considerations like ‘fairness’, ‘reason’ and ‘religious equality’, presidential candidate Donald Trump has managed to slash through the Gordian Knot of US national security in one fearlessly, brilliant stroke. The man is nothing short of a genius… Continue reading →

Under the Heading… WTF??

Old Time Gloryhole

I needed a little something for my very first post in order to see how things look and I settled on what happens to be the oldest known photograph of Helmut Von Dinkelwurst, the inventor of the Glory Hole.

This is clearly one of his early prototypes and it would seem, from the expression on his face that it wasn’t especially successful… or else it turned out to be pretty darned good (I can’t decide)’

I’ll leave it to you to make your own ‘pecker’ jokes…